To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition, to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived -- this is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
All of the twenty or so boys staying there have experienced boy sexual and physical abuse.
The average age when the abuse occurred for the first time was three, and for most, the abuse continued for many years until the "System" became involved.
Mr. McGuill went on to explain that this is just one of many facilities serving the Santa Fe - Albuquerque area, and there is no shortage of children.
This brought back terrible memories for me.
At age ten, I was raped by as pedophile and again at age 12. These acts were committed by different men who were friends of my father. In addition, both of my parents were physically abusive. By age fifteen, I was living with a gang on the streets of Toronto. Thirty years later these events continue to affect my life. My partner was consistently sexually abused by her older brother from age 7 to age 14 (I cannot comprehend why her parents allowed it to go on), and she too continues to battle the effects of abuse to this day.
The sad, but true, facts are one in six boys will be sexually abused by age 16, one in four girls will be sexually abused by age 14, and one in three girls will be sexually abused by age 18. Most abused and neglected children never come to the attention of authorities. This is especially true of sexually abused children; there is no physical sign of harm, there is always intense shame, and secrecy is often maintained, even by adults who knot of the abuse for fear of destroying a "family."
| One out of six boys is sexually abused by age 16. |
Every day in the United States, four children die due to abuse or neglect. In 1991, there were approximately 820,000 reported incidences of child abuse; 45 percent for neglect, 25 percent for physical abuse, 16 percent for sexual abuse and the remaining 14 percent from emotional and other forms of abuse. Girls were victims 53 percent of the time and boys 47 percent. Of the victims, 63 percent were nine years old or younger, and lest we think this is a problem of poverty or minorities, 56 percent of the abuse took place in "white" homes.
When a child victim of abuse is referred to the system for investigation, it is usually to agencies that are cooperative and strongly committed in principle to the protection and best interests of every child. Despite the best intentions, the children are often re-victimized by the system. Historically, children are force to retell their story many times to the different agencies involved in the investigation. These interviews take place in forbidding offices with little thought given to the age and vulnerability of the child. Children receive little or no counseling to help them recover from their trauma, and are at great risk of a life of further victimization or perpetration of abuse.
If one is to believe the media and feminists, all domestic violence is committed by males. We often hear about "deadbeat Dads" but never about bad mothers. For every O.J. Simpson there is a Susan Smith. In fact 55 percent of all abuse committed against children is done by women (usually the mother) and women commit physical abuse to children by a better than two to one margin.
Dr. Duncan Lindsey writes in the Social Work Research Journal (March 1994) that Protective Services are simply not meeting a primary mandate: the prevention of childhood death from abuse and neglect. We are unable to predict child abuse with a useful degree of accuracy. One study successfully predicted abuse in only 8 percent of cases. He also states that programs are not working and cited a study where "high risk" families receiving counseling help did not have lower incident rates than that of the general population. He concludes by voicing his concern about children being returned to an environment to be abused again.
Ultimately, our community pays an enormous price in the violent and failed lives that are too often the future of abused children, and unless the victim can come to terms with their past, the abuse will perpetuate with future generations. One need look no further than the gang population of Albuquerque (on a per capita basis, higher than Los Angeles) -- hundreds of abused or fatherless boys acting out their anger at the world.
And, what price does the child pay? The loss of innocence; the right to be a child protected, instead of being abused, by people who should be caring for him. A little boy or girl should be playing with his/her friends, not being brutalized by someone with no power, thus diminishing what little power the child had.
Villa Santa Maria is funded by the United Way and deserves our help. All data in this article comes from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect.
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