One man who showed up several years ago was far from the Mr. Mom type. He was poor, uneducated, and his child support payments left him homeless. His ex-wife did not want him around his child. He was too poor to hire an attorney and not bright enough to be pro se. What he did have was a sense of obligation and love for his child.
A medical doctor with post graduate education and dedication for his son eventually, through two years of legal battles, won the right to have his son on a regular basis. His vindictive wife had few limits in her desire to exclude her ex from seeing his son. She used psychologically damaging means to exclude the father even though this severely harmed her son.
A paternity father and his new wife have spent tens of thousands of dollars trying to keep up with a mother who has run from state to state to make sure the father could not see his child. The father was only seeing his child about once every six months, but had a driving desire to be as much a father as he could for his mostly absent child. The father and his new wife have wandered through various state jurisdictions to maintain his presence to his child.
A left over sixty's fellow has been harassed by the courts in a rural county. He's been falsely accused of sexual abuse of his young daughter and every time he goes to pick up his children, his ex-wife attempts to set him up for harassment and a restraining order. Every pick up of his children is stressful, but his fatherly love drives him to continue. He now must bring a witness with him and tapes all pick up's of his kids.
A forty something vet shows up with rough hands from driving trucks and earth moving equipment. He's not the reading type, just a simple good man who says he can cook a better meal than his ex-wife. He needs an attorney to help him straighten out his financial settlement. He wants 50/50 custody even though he works 60 hours a week. It's not the child support he wants to avoid. His rough callused hands crave to give tenderness to his daughter.
None of these men fit the Mr. Mom stereotype. Some are old, some young. Some are politically conservative, some liberal. Some are well educated, others can barely write a sentence. Some have traditional female style nurturing skills, and all have traditional male style nurturing skills. Our courts have yet to overcome the bias that ignores that male nurturing skills are just as important to the welfare of children as female nurturing skills. This is another topic. However, even though these men are diverse, they share the following characteristic: these dads all love their children and know that fathering is far more than paying a child-support order. They realize that children need fathers to survive and prosper, and they struggle against the odds so that their children will grow and blossom.
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