We often hear from feminists that women make only $.59 for every dollar a man makes. (The actual figure has increased over the years, but I continue to hear 59 cents.) Of course, the implication in this statistic is that men and women are not getting equal pay for equal work; that women are getting cheated, and corrective action must be taken.
Which is nonsense. Unequal pay for equal work was outlawed by the U.S. government in 1964. Men get more money generally because they work more hours and strive to obtain the higher paying jobs---different pay for different work. But, of course, the Me Gender doesn't want us to know these "little" details. Well, it's time to holler those details. Or as my old granddad always used to say: "The dust of exploded beliefs makes a fine sunset."
Who else but the Me Gender would be so selective about what facts and statistics they use. And who else but the Me Gender would repeat these untruths and half- truths over and over and over, drowning out any attempt at balance. Or as my old granddad always used to say: "Big fires flare up in a wind, while little ones are blown out." Is the theme song for feminism "Twist and Shout?" Twist the data, and Shout the distortions until everyone believes them.
Another implication in the $.59-on-the-dollar figure is that he/she who makes the money has the power. This isn't quite right. The power in money is derived from spending it. If I make a million dollars and let Otto determine how to spend it, Otto will be a lot more popular than me. Or as my old granddad always used to say, "It duzn't matter how much is in your wallet if you left it at home." Making money is a lot of work. Spending money is power.
Well, so what? If men make more money, then they certainly spend more. Again, not quite right. An economic statistic the Me Gender is rather bashful about letting anyone hear is that women spend 4 consumer dollars for every consumer dollar that men spend. Even if women are not spending all of this on themselves, it gives them a lot of economic power -- 4 times more.
Now, let's put those stats together for a second. Women make $.59 on the dollar, and women spend $4.00 on the dollar. Ummmmm. I may have been sitting under an apple tree too long, but it looks to me like women get a lot of their money from men.
Of course, women facilitate this financial exchange by using sex. Men want sex, which women can give to them. And women want money, which men can give to them. So, men and women enter into a nice meretricious bargaining arrangement. "Meretricious" is such a good word. It sounds so much better than "prostitution." But more about that in a later column.
But, right now, I would like to focus on how this economic relationship relates to our perspectives on aging. Some women (Jane Fonda comes to mind) complain that men age so much more gracefully than women. But this goes back to the fact that men's and women's powers occur at different times. Women have the most sexual power when they are younger---late teens, 20s. While men's economic power (having money which women want) usually doesn't come along till much later in life. So women start losing their power when men are starting to gain theirs. Hence, men age gracefully. Of course, I don't hear anyone (not even Jane Fonda) complaining about the flip side of this timing problem---the fact that young men have little power. (Keep all this in mind the next time you see cosmetic- surgery Jane prancing around in a tight leotard. Also remember that she is not married to a dishwasher at Denny's.)
The hypocrisy continues after marriage. Consider household finances and housework. Women are constantly whining that men are not performing half of the household chores and child care duties. The complaint is that men and women are equal and have equal responsibility for the household. Funny how women are suddenly silent about that $.59 on the dollar statistic. Maybe men will be more eager to do half of the housework when women start bringing in a dollar for every dollar the men bring in. So much for equal responsibility. Women's ability to twist anything to their benefit is truly amazing. But as my old granddad always used to say: "Puttin' your boots in the oven don't make 'em biscuits."
We've all been eating too much shoe leather lately. It's time for a more balanced diet.
(Balder's Granddad liked to paraphrase Geoffrey Madan, St. Francis De Sales, and a DJ in Texas.)
Email to the Editor -- If you don't want your email to be considered for publication in the "Email to the Editor" column, say so.